Dis Conley. Very sciting too days (2) ( I can count 1 2 3 4 5 6 ahhh.....well nebbermine). Enyways so very sciting lass too days. Well reely juss lass nite an dis mornin. MomPerson she hopin dat the sciting part ob da day ober.
See MomPerson got a brudder like Nigel an Llewis brudders, Mom and (whassisname, Llewis?) Mom an Barry dey brudder an sister. Not da same lidder. Well kinda da same lidder. It a--lemme fink-- a repeat breeding. Dass it. Mom da 2d one. Barry he da older won.
Ok so dey almoss neber see eech oder. He done libed all ober like Hawaii whut sumplace long way away where lib Bo an Harley Brewer, too.
Barry he be a peepeldoctor but he retried. Retired. Dat he in da pixchure but it taken long time ago he still pretty much da same scept no pony tail.
Enyways lass nite he in downtown place wif da big bildings and Mom and DadPerson drive to meet he an Alice (he wifey) for dinner sumplace nice. And whut you fink?? MOMPERSON DONE COME HOME WITH TWO WHITE BOXES! And she say yeah dis you breaffest! Oh man dey smellt sooooooo gooooood. We wanna em NOW but she say no dis breaffass. So we go to bed.
(Scuse me here a minnit Ise tryina figure how da helck to put dis picther ob Llewis where I wants it.)
Ok here we goes. Dis be Llewis course youse
all nose who Llewis are. So enyways at 4 dis mornin Llewis woken up an gotta pee. Ebber day he do dis and ebber mornin MomPerson ged up an let all we ousside and da scents in da mornin at 4 are wunnerful so we stays ousside about 10 or elebenteen minits and den come in, gedda treet an go bek to bed.
Well I not sayin whut happent. Nope. I not.
Dis mornin MomPerson let we all out an me an Nigel we wants bek in right away on account ob whut happent that I ain't tellin. MomPerson open da door an neerly fall ober at da smell ob
SKUNK
whut come in wif we spesially on liddel Conley's eers an headbone. MomPerson she not heppy. She callt da odders in but nobuddy else
Juss Liddel Conley pore liddel Conley wif MomPerson goin NONOGOAWAYNONOOFFMYBEDGETIN YOU CRATE HURRY HURRY an Ise so upseeted I runned into Nigel's crate and rub all ober he crate pad. It were TOO an axident.whut come in wif we spesially on liddel Conley's eers an headbone. MomPerson she not heppy. She callt da odders in but nobuddy else
MomPerson flinging open winnows and runnin round wif a fleshlite lookin for da stuff she rub on dat dont need wadder, cant fine it nowheres finely sprayt somefin onna cloth an rubbd it all obver Conley's liddel hed an eers, she say da eers da worstist, done did drag em thro da smell whut musta been on da grass I aint tellin.
Well by dis time it 5 in da mornin an MomPerson trys to go beke to bed. She tosst an turnt as much she can do wif Cooper layin half on her. Finely she jus git up and here come da BESTEST fing ever:
She gots out dem white boxes and she pulls out dese BIG chunksa meet, man my mouf watrin all over juss riting about it. An she done trim whut she say fat off cuz she no want we to git
pancreeyeyetus sumfin like dat. An juss like she promist she chunked up dat meet an put some in eech dish an add sum reel doggie food an dat are breafuss.
WOW were it GOOD! nOW lemme see if I kin remembers whut it were:
Ok: Pryin rip wifout da bone. (I wooda liked da bone, but hey.) MomPersons almoss raw bloody an da juiceys squirding in me mouf...Aunt Alice's super done all crusty crunch wif a bouquet ob beeffillin da nostrils......ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
Oh. Den MomPerson nock DadPerson's coffee onna new rug an den dropt too big hebby glass plates in da driveway. She not sure she shold go ousside agin but we outta dog food so I guess she will, I hope, no more white boxes in da big cold fing.
Enybuddy got Pryin Nibs youse not want, you sendem rite along to we, care ob Conley. I takes good care ob it.
Love an Happiness Day to Ebberbuddy.
Conley